Anxiety It's New For Me

I am the QUEEN of Anxiety. When my headaches got worse, I went from being the Gemini Social Butterfly who was gregarious beyond believe and loved everyone, to Anxious Annie who jumps at the slightest thing and has to deal with panic attacks and anxiety when out in public and around people I don't know.

So. First thing's first. My inbox is always open, either here at the Pad or at my name plus at gmail dot com. I have a HUGE shoulder and listen to anything and everything and what you say to me STAYS with me. I'm a locked vault who has secrets from my friends when I was 8 still and those words have never been uttered. I am a FIRM believer in what goes in does NOT come out.

Second. Anxiety. There are several ways to handle it depending on the stress levels.

One. Fidget spinners. Have you considered those? Let me know if you're interested, I have a very specific one I use because it's small, fits in my hand and has moving balls on the end that you can run your fingers over and provide satisfying tactile responses. For some, fidget spinners are very distracting and make matters worse, for others (like me) it strangely makes you focus more and calms you. The anxiety will have me scattered and EVERYTHING is grabbing my attention, this makes my focus sharp and I'm zoned in on what I need to be focused on. It's also saved my fingers because I tend to rub the embossed letters on my dog tags which makes things worse. Ouch!

Two. Breathing. I know it sounds super silly, but when you find your anxiety levels rising, stop, relax your shoulders as much as you can and then take in a deep slow breath and count to six. When you've reached six (slooow breath and push your tummy out when you do until it's full.) then slowly let it out for six seconds. Breath normally for a few moments and then repeat. Do this at least six times with the six count. Don't do it so you feel faint, hence the breathing in between, but make sure you do this at least six times and you'll find yourself relaxing. (Psychological jargon, when we're anxious, your brain sends out signals for the flight response because it senses we're in danger, this makes the anxiety raise more and it's a vicious cycle. When you breathe deep like this, you're brain goes "Oh! We're obviously not in danger, everyone stand down and put on your sunglasses because we are soooo coooool.")

Two point five. If you can, chew gum or eat a small snack. This is another signal to your brain. If you can eat, you're obviously not in danger, so your body chills again.

Three. Find some white noise for while you're at work. Sounds at work probably don't help your anxiety levels. Find some rain or soothing non-verbal music that you can sneak in really low at the office. They also have white noise fans that sit on your desk and literally dampen sounds around you.

Fourth, have this hug, I made it specially for you and know that you CAN and WILL get through this and we are all here to support you! ::HUUUUUUUG!::

Hope things get better for you!

 

living with agoraphobia and panic disorder since age 13, it amazing how much this heklps



(or bargain with it, if it says u gonna throw up - take a wastepaper basket with you, if it says u gonna wet yourself - wear a pad)

 

You've gotten some good tips. Also, an essential oil blend for relaxation might help. I am using one at night when I go to bed which is helping me to relax and go back to sleep easier.

 

So sorry for the loss of your Mum, that is such a major upheaval...

i have suffered from anxiety attacks since I was at uni. Back then, it was very specific events that set me off - exams etc - and yep, did have severe anxiety attack at my wedding, had to step out of church for a few minutes to recover (it is still talked about 20+years later!). I was lucky back then, in that once I had my attack, it was done and I could put it behind me. Now if I get anxiety, as I did at the over the end of last year and up until a few weeks ago, I was having a low level anxiety attacks continuously. Not good for health/sleep and making decisions about anything was impossible. It was partly due to my Dad passing away and a few issues I had with my Mum in the aftermath, nothing major but a few resentments on my behalf that i had to deal with I think. And my youngest son suffers anxiety as well and it gets to a stage where we stress each other out, each of us worrying about the other - nice circle.

Last month, my son was doing so much better, that lifted some of my anxiety and I took my Mum on holiday and that lessened the guilt I felt. I hadn't realised until I read your post @KatrinaHunt13 , that I was feeling normal again.

For me, dealing with anxiety means getting unfinished business crossed off lists. Short term solutions include getting outside, away from everyone, deep breathing and white noise is wonderful.

Good luck and I hope this is just a short term condition.

 

My husband deals with anxiety. He alternates between a fidget cube and a fidget spinner. He also finds it helpful to journal. He writes down what is worrying him, and has found that helps him. When he sees it in black and white it's not as overwhelming.
My friend has found that she does better when she exercises everyday. That's her therapy. I hope you find something that works for you!

 

All of these are good ideas, and to put Courtney and Karen's together, get a small journal to keep in your purse (or back pocket if you're like me and hate purses..) and whip it out when you feel the anxiety building. Immediately start writing down every unfinished thing that you need to get done. Deadlines, everything on your plate right now. Leave space between them. In those between spaces, see what you can do to break it down into smaller chunks.

"I need to clean my refrigerator." Break it down. "I'll start by touching NOTHING but fruits first. Once the fruits are cleaned out or neatened, I'll throw away veggies. Then I'll move to tupperware." One shelf at a time, one item at a time.

"I need to clean up the livingroom." Break it down. "I'll pick up ONLY trash first, I won't touch anything but the trash. Once all the trash it picked up and tossed, I'll move on to touching ONLY the clothing and put that away where it goes. THEN I'll move on to books that need to be picked up."

When you tackle thing one item at a time, one phase at a time (don't do drawers, do items, not only does it inspire, but then it doesn't get overwhelming and you don't want to quit before you even fully get started.) then everything seems less stressful and less enormous, causing anxiety to go down.

Do this with deadlines, work things, break projects down into folders. Do one folder at a time if you can, or do all the line items at a time. Seeing things crossed off your list, as they said above, really DOES help take that stress off of your shoulders.

Have a soothing scent (subtle, don't overwhelm your senses with something superiorly strong!) going and some white noise or soft music and BAM! It's a one two punch that will help at least make your anxiety more manageable or hopefully gone!

As always, we are behind you and here for you and we want you to succeed!! You CAN do this! Remember and repeat that, always use CAN words. Never say "I can't" or "It's too tough." or something. Say "I WILL get over this." or "It's difficult but I CAN manage." Don't use can't words because then you're mind is already "Whelp. I'm done, obviously we can't, why bother?" You can and will, it just takes determination!! We believe in you!! <3

 

((hugs)) it is so hard to lose a parent! ((hugs)

my dil deals with anxiety, for her she deals by running, and it has to be by herself. My son is a runner too so at times they do run together, but if she is having a hard time she goes out on her own. Life for her has gotten easier once she quit her job and is now a homemaker, but I know that is not an option for everyone.

 

@KatrinaHunt13 - I'm sorry to read that you are struggling and hope you can find something that helps!!

I never-ever had anxiety until a couple of years ago - and I can tell that it's getting worse. Mine came pretty much out of nowhere!

I do lots of breathing techniques, listen to calming music (or nature sounds) and I do use Essential oils as @bcgal00 mentioned - My 'go to' when I'm really anxious is "Peace and Calming" - it helps.

Keeping you in thoughts Katrina!!

 

I've had a lot more anxiety since being around the age of menopause. It really sucks. I find that exercise really helps me -even if it's just 15 minutes.

 

I'm so sorry about your mom. I do sometimes have anxiety attacks and I am taking notes about all these things.

 

@dawnmarch Yes, I find that exercise is good too. I kind of hate exercise but do find my mood levels out and I feel tired but good after a good workout. These days I'm doing more pilates and walking which totally de-stresses me.

 

I'm so sorry about your Mom. I had panic attacks for a year in my 20's. Here are a couple of things that worked for me:
* your mind might convince you that you're going to die but people don't die of panic attacks
* when I'm having trouble sleeping and my mind is racing, this is what I do (I made it up and it works every time)... when I inhale, I spell relax R-E-L-A-X then when I exhale I spell it backwards X-A-L-E-R. You have to concentrate a bit to do it backwards, so it occupies your mind and spelling makes you breathe a little slower and deeper
* I used to meditate on a quote that I love: "My fears are more numerous than my dangers and I suffer more in my imagination than in reality." It's by Seneca

Hugs to you and I hope you can see that many other people suffer from something similar. I think it's a brilliant idea to see someone. I had one visit to a therapist and she recommended a book for me which helped immensely. Good luck, sweetie!

 

Stress and anxiety are my non wanted friends too. When it first started I was at university so used the free counselling service but now like @Serena said I focus on breathing. Now I probably haven't had a major attack since late last year.

 

Anxiety is not a stranger to me either (I think a lot of people suffer from it but won't seek help). I try to calm myself by listening to songs I love or doing things I enjoy doing that don't cause me stess (which doesn't always include scrapbooking).

I think seeking professional help is always a good step. They're full of good tips to help with anxiety and can also prescribe medication of those tips don't work (if that's the route you want to go down).

Anxiety is hard because sometimes it's hard to tell what triggers it. But you have a great support team here (my inbox is also always open).

 

I think anxiety runs in my family. I've had it forever, and it's getting worse lately. I had to leave the grocery store last week because I all the lights and people and noises made my anxiety level rise. Hubby took the list and finished the shopping while I sat in the car. I just never know when something triggers it. That trip also coincided with the anniversary of my mother's death, so I had a lot of things on my mind that day.

 

I'm so sorry for your loss! I have generalized anxiety disorder and OCD. I take medicine or I probably wouldn't function as well. Self care is vital. Find time for yourself every day.

 

My anxiety is related to PTSD. I'll remember bad things out of nowhere & be a mess. I take medication because it works. I take an anti-depressant daily & an anti-anxiety when I feel it coming on. I am generally a very calm person, but anxiety changes me. A cold dark room really helps keep me comfortable. Good luck with everything. I know it can be so hard.